dirtsy's cat treats
[18 June, 2004 typed at 5:37 p.m.]

ever find that when you want to write an entry diaryland is only letting gold members through, makes me wanna be one wink wink

it's mid-way june, thats so far into the year and i cant believe how fast it has gone, it seems that just made me realise time goes slow when you are doing a job you dont enjoy, living with people you dont like and not having any friends to go out and party with....

i make my life sound so...disgustingly horrible (and sumtimes it was)

im sitting and talking with melia on the good ol' msn

as it seems i cant play wheel of fortune, maybe someone could help me wink wink

james gets back from italy in like two days which is good, italy...i mean it'll be good to catch up and have a beer with him....

still having a time with this piece i want to write [struggle]

maybe i should actually put some ideas to paper as apposed to thinking of putting ideas on paper.....

maybe if i get back to the roots of listening to music on my discman, it might give me some clarity

i dunno why im getting so uptight about it - it's just the same ol' same old..... me writing about how mum pissed me off four and score years ago and how i dealt with it - should be so easy to write unless you thnik you've covered everythink (feelings wise) on the topic, maybe i should start being original and set my sights on sumthink different go back to writing about love or ummm..........happiness??

maybe i should make a chili peppers song, where by it's not on one particular subject as apposed to just a kick ass song

maybe i should just sit back and absorb the world and then plant the idea onto paper

and maybe, just maybe i could forget about lyric/poetry writing all together?

yeah, like i could do that!!!!!

that'd be like me never (EVER) writing in here again.....and right now, im not sure if i could stop,

i've hit nearely two years on this bad boy.........

two years of rants, bloody filled emotions, heartfelt lyrics, tearful entries that hurt to write

(i know for those of you who have had diaries for like a million years, you dont think two years would be a big milestone, but it is, exspecially for me, looking back at entry one and thinking what a sad pathetic lovesick loser would pour his heart out like that, but also realise that if i didnt i'd be angered beyond belief

a 19 year old with no purpose and no direction, now soon to be 21 (in 8 days) with somewhat direction and definately a purpose!!!

this week on the stereo you should have: Alert Status Red - Matthew Good

[likin' the templates????]

away + towards