the dream is over
[19 April, 2004 typed at 8:25 p.m.]

it seem that my life ends in a month..

imagine being told you have a month to live...knowing when you are going to die!

thats what it feels like, i know - might sound a little over dramatic...but i swear you know what im talking about

the dream is over - the dream is done along with me

i am wasted i am nothink i am a boy in love left to slowly rot in the gutter that is loneliness

...and i saw it coming

the highs werent followed by the lows, until now

it's sitting in my stomach, that damn knotted up feeling, knowing that in 30 days i will be getting the scalple and cutting my own heart out (not to mention yours)

where's a teenage (or semi-adult) heartwrenching love/hate song when you need one?

knowing you never know when you might get to see that one thing ever again....as much as you strive and try - your efforts might go wasted or they might be rewarded, but wouldn't you rather stay where you are with your loved one and be hit by a bus, rather not being in the same country as your loved one and being hit by a bus, just to have that last breath moment to share with them, to have them be the last thing you see before the light....

as apposed to a world you despise and can never see yourself living in ever again!

so thank u canada, you've shown me the light, you've shown me things i think that i deserve and things to strive for, you are truly the land of opportunity - but danielle you are so much more then you will ever seem to me, you are everythink and more than what i asked for....

thank u

i love you

goodbye

away + towards